I object! There are many things about getting older that seem to be a given. We will slow down, perhaps have some arthritis, maybe not do all that we could do in those younger years (two years ago), but must we have teenage acne come upon us again.
I had it when I went through puberty and here it is again, post menopause. Being a woman has many interesting, if not fun, physical manifestations: Periods, PMS, childbearing, pre-menopause, post menopause, hysterectomy, and some new hair growth in places that never had it, and now pimples, to name a few. I object again!
Several friends and I have pacts that we cannot go to our graves with hair on our chinny-chin-chin. Pluck is a must! Now, apparently, I am going to have to add a foundation concealer for my complexion. What else is looming out there in the world of normal aging?
I am well aware that there are worse things. I have some of them. But sometimes the little things just get under my skin, so to speak. If I must suffer with a malady, can’t I at least have clear skin and no errant hairs. I have heard about aging gracefully, but think perhaps I have missed the boat. I feel about as graceful as a 13-year-old at a dance; all clumsy feet and pimples.
At least my husband is aging with me. I love the hair growing out of his ears; something that is normal for a aging guy. Yes! I threaten to pluck them, but must not. They are his to worry about.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Dog Days of Summer
This is me metaphorically falling on my sword. I promised I would not complain about the heat, if summer ever arrived. Apparently I lied. The hot days hit, and I became a whining and complaining a/c seeker. I hate the heat, and have never been so glad to see the end of summer. Bring on the cool autumn days, bringing with it the crisp mornings and sweet evenings. I can breathe in these temperatures. Breathing is nice.
I love to get really cold in the night and snuggle under the covers. It is so much easier to warm up than cool down! So goodbye to those hot, sultry days and hello to personal comfort. And to my friends who are heat lovers (and my husband), too bad. I don't control the weather, and now it is my turn to relish the change of season.
I love to get really cold in the night and snuggle under the covers. It is so much easier to warm up than cool down! So goodbye to those hot, sultry days and hello to personal comfort. And to my friends who are heat lovers (and my husband), too bad. I don't control the weather, and now it is my turn to relish the change of season.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Routine
This is a word that can evoke fear of the humdrum, but I would like to propose a little different view. A routine can be comforting during times of strife and unease. It is nice to look to that special something that is daily-done. In my case, it is getting up with an excellent cup of coffee and reading the paper. I love this start to my day. While it is routine, I don’t consider it monotonous.
I believe that many see others as having the life to be envied. Maybe those folks party, or travel constantly. possibly they own a summer home and seem to have the car, the looks, the houses, and be the “bells of the ball.” Or perhaps it is all perception by others. We cannot know what is truly in another’s heart; especially that of a stranger or mere acquaintance. These are possibly humdrum to them, because it is their routine. They need this to be centered in what is their truth of existence.
I would not trade my routine for theirs, not knowing what drives them. I wish all of us well as we look for a way to be in this continually troubled world. If our little routines bring us comfort and a way to face the day, then a little of the humdrum and monotonous works for me; and perhaps you.
I believe that many see others as having the life to be envied. Maybe those folks party, or travel constantly. possibly they own a summer home and seem to have the car, the looks, the houses, and be the “bells of the ball.” Or perhaps it is all perception by others. We cannot know what is truly in another’s heart; especially that of a stranger or mere acquaintance. These are possibly humdrum to them, because it is their routine. They need this to be centered in what is their truth of existence.
I would not trade my routine for theirs, not knowing what drives them. I wish all of us well as we look for a way to be in this continually troubled world. If our little routines bring us comfort and a way to face the day, then a little of the humdrum and monotonous works for me; and perhaps you.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Today’s word: Sunshine
Sunshine is healing to the psyche. There are really no two ways about it. The dark and gray days feel heavy, like a wool blanket pulled over our eyes. While we reap great reward here in Oregon, by virtue of our heavenly greenery and trees, it doesn’t feel so heavenly when we have been doused to within an inch of our lives with the wetness from above. Then the glorious sun peeks out and we become renewed and smile once again. It is easy to forget those wintery days, when the rays shine upon you. They sink into the body and give a sense of well being to those with arms stretched out to greet it. People are friendlier and not in such a rush. Summer life is good, and the livin’ is easy. Bring on the lemondade.
The word sunshine evokes imagery of picnics, water play, blankets thrown on the lawn, and sprinklers turned on for the little ones to run through. The Fourth of July and watermelon we can the taste on the tongue, as we venture toward that date with the hope that the sun will be with us. Everything feels a little better and sometimes our troubles melt away for a brief time. BBQ’s are fired up and sparklers are lighted.
Let summer commence, and I promise to not complain about the heat!
The word sunshine evokes imagery of picnics, water play, blankets thrown on the lawn, and sprinklers turned on for the little ones to run through. The Fourth of July and watermelon we can the taste on the tongue, as we venture toward that date with the hope that the sun will be with us. Everything feels a little better and sometimes our troubles melt away for a brief time. BBQ’s are fired up and sparklers are lighted.
Let summer commence, and I promise to not complain about the heat!
Monday, May 31, 2010
Sacrifice.....Memorial Day
Today’s word: Sacrifice
This is a word that inspires humbleness on the part of those who witness. Today is that in which we honor our Veterans, dead and alive. They have given their lives in the worst case, and their time, running into years, in the best case. They have sacrificed living for some, and sacrificed innocence for others. There is no place to hide from what they have seen, except the grave, where perhaps they finally understand why they had to sacrifice.
An unintended honoring on Memorial Day is for those whom we love that have died in other ways. Many have sacrificed their children, unwillingly, in the teenage wars of cars, speed, and death. Others have the same outcome from drugs and lifestyle. Innocence lost once again, and all we can do is mourn. This sacrifice is not meant to be such, but we miss those children, fathers, mothers, husbands, just as much in this everyday life, which can be like a war.
In memory of all of those Veteran’s who died protecting the integrity and safety of their country. A noble sacrifice which has no equal.
This is a word that inspires humbleness on the part of those who witness. Today is that in which we honor our Veterans, dead and alive. They have given their lives in the worst case, and their time, running into years, in the best case. They have sacrificed living for some, and sacrificed innocence for others. There is no place to hide from what they have seen, except the grave, where perhaps they finally understand why they had to sacrifice.
An unintended honoring on Memorial Day is for those whom we love that have died in other ways. Many have sacrificed their children, unwillingly, in the teenage wars of cars, speed, and death. Others have the same outcome from drugs and lifestyle. Innocence lost once again, and all we can do is mourn. This sacrifice is not meant to be such, but we miss those children, fathers, mothers, husbands, just as much in this everyday life, which can be like a war.
In memory of all of those Veteran’s who died protecting the integrity and safety of their country. A noble sacrifice which has no equal.
A Special Word
I love words and have decided to write about some of my favorites. The first one I will choose is imagine. A word that inspired the John Lennon song “Imagine,” which is my favorite song of all time. This magical sounding word that inspires authors to write and painters to paint; musicians to sing or play and others to dream. Imagine creating a Harry Potter fantasy world, or imagine that all those who are hungry will eat; everywhere!
Imagine no war where we lose our men and women, many who are very young, and imagine what their future might have been. Imagine what will create my own happiness and strive for it. Imagine an intact family, but continue on in a shattered family. Imagine finding new happiness anyway. Be satisfied with the joy I have had, and that which remains with me. I can imagine that. A wonderful word which is full of mystery and possibilities, because where we can imagine it, we can perceive it, and then create it. Imagine on!!
Imagine no war where we lose our men and women, many who are very young, and imagine what their future might have been. Imagine what will create my own happiness and strive for it. Imagine an intact family, but continue on in a shattered family. Imagine finding new happiness anyway. Be satisfied with the joy I have had, and that which remains with me. I can imagine that. A wonderful word which is full of mystery and possibilities, because where we can imagine it, we can perceive it, and then create it. Imagine on!!
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Musings
April 1, 2010 and May 28, 2010
I am noticing the days slip by, as time marches forward. I have been in a reflective mood and looking at the scope of my life thus far. This one life includes all those lives who have been in relationship with me. The children of John and I, and of my friends have grown and continued on into their destiny. I witness our adult children have lives that no longer revolve around their family of origin, but around their adult families and friends. It doesn’t mean that they do not care, just like it didn’t mean that I did not care. It is the evolution of a life, and it is being witnessed by we elders; those who have gone before.
It seems a distant past since I was that young woman, raising the boys. It all happened so fast. While I have much life still in front of me, it now gives me insight to look at the past. Our past is an early indicator of our future; still to be determined. I wouldn’t have wanted a crystal ball to know what was ahead, but outside of Alex’s death, there is not much I would change.
I remain grateful for all those people who are either in my life, or have passed through on their own journey. Each person has touched me in a unique way, and I would not be who I am without that imprint.
I read a quote in the Oregonian from a Reverend Marilyn Sewell, which speaks to that which I have learned:
“Grief turns out to be our best teacher. It comes with loss and hangs around like a faithful dog until we learn what we need to know. When we are awake and engaged in the moment, fully alive, we find we are not so dependent on person or place. And in that freedom, we become unconstrained in our choices, fearless in our loving. We have come home at last.”
This says what I feel and know. I choose not to judge, but to accept and love. It is a freedom which had eluded me for many years, but I have reached for it since March 1994. I now try to stay in the moment, “awake and engaged.”
Terri
I am noticing the days slip by, as time marches forward. I have been in a reflective mood and looking at the scope of my life thus far. This one life includes all those lives who have been in relationship with me. The children of John and I, and of my friends have grown and continued on into their destiny. I witness our adult children have lives that no longer revolve around their family of origin, but around their adult families and friends. It doesn’t mean that they do not care, just like it didn’t mean that I did not care. It is the evolution of a life, and it is being witnessed by we elders; those who have gone before.
It seems a distant past since I was that young woman, raising the boys. It all happened so fast. While I have much life still in front of me, it now gives me insight to look at the past. Our past is an early indicator of our future; still to be determined. I wouldn’t have wanted a crystal ball to know what was ahead, but outside of Alex’s death, there is not much I would change.
I remain grateful for all those people who are either in my life, or have passed through on their own journey. Each person has touched me in a unique way, and I would not be who I am without that imprint.
I read a quote in the Oregonian from a Reverend Marilyn Sewell, which speaks to that which I have learned:
“Grief turns out to be our best teacher. It comes with loss and hangs around like a faithful dog until we learn what we need to know. When we are awake and engaged in the moment, fully alive, we find we are not so dependent on person or place. And in that freedom, we become unconstrained in our choices, fearless in our loving. We have come home at last.”
This says what I feel and know. I choose not to judge, but to accept and love. It is a freedom which had eluded me for many years, but I have reached for it since March 1994. I now try to stay in the moment, “awake and engaged.”
Terri
Thursday, February 25, 2010
More Changes
I wrote about change before and wished for positive change. It has arrived. John went back into full-time work and is very happy about it. I miss him being here during the day, but I will find a new way to manage my days. At first depression sneaked up on me and gave me a couple of bad days; or at least that is what I thought. Magically, it seemed like, I woke up today and felt renewed and better. I think the days of trepidation and depression were more about wrapping my arms around change, once again.
There are psychological tests which consider any change, good or bad, to be challenging to the psyche. Basically, we do not like change at our deep levels. So even a good change can rock the boat of stability. I have been rockin’ away, because that is how I cope. Sure wish a good shopping trip, or meditation, or an excellent book would replace the rocking boat. They cannot. It just takes a little time to adjust, and I think that positive change is a lot easer to assimilate than negative change. So my little boat has jumped the slip and sailed out to sea. The waters are calm and so am I.
There are psychological tests which consider any change, good or bad, to be challenging to the psyche. Basically, we do not like change at our deep levels. So even a good change can rock the boat of stability. I have been rockin’ away, because that is how I cope. Sure wish a good shopping trip, or meditation, or an excellent book would replace the rocking boat. They cannot. It just takes a little time to adjust, and I think that positive change is a lot easer to assimilate than negative change. So my little boat has jumped the slip and sailed out to sea. The waters are calm and so am I.
Monday, February 1, 2010
I wrote this after a bit of reflection. It is time for me to let things go and do a lot of self care. I think this poem was just the push I needed. It came from that place inside where we know what is true for us. So while the poem seems sad, it is really more of a major thrust into my future. Because the future is now; today. I am yesterday's future and tomorrow's past, and it is time for me to seize the moment. Seize it with me.
I’m tired.
No more waiting
No more too early
Or too late.
Now.
Be true to me,
No one can take care of me,
except me.
Now is the time.
Today.
I’m tired.
No more waiting
No more too early
Or too late.
Now.
Be true to me,
No one can take care of me,
except me.
Now is the time.
Today.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
H1N1 aka Swine Flu
Well, haven’t I been having a good time? Wasn’t sure if I had the swine flu or not, but the doc said there are several strains. Isn’t that just the best news!!! So I probably had one strain, and I am now inoculated against I don’t know how many others. But are they the right ones? I think this could be a long, long winter.
It feels like the flu is this cognizant entity that is after me, and I must hide to avoid it. But hiding out is so boring, so I have thrown caution to the wind and actually left my house. However, every time someone sneezes or coughs, I am on guard. Do they have the wicked germ which is stalking me, or are they living with this evil cough which lasts for weeks, but is not contagious? There is no way to tell.
So I will stealthily go about my business, trying to not get close to anyone. I will bathe in hand-sanitizer with the hope that I will avoid another bout. Good luck to you all and I wish you good health.
It feels like the flu is this cognizant entity that is after me, and I must hide to avoid it. But hiding out is so boring, so I have thrown caution to the wind and actually left my house. However, every time someone sneezes or coughs, I am on guard. Do they have the wicked germ which is stalking me, or are they living with this evil cough which lasts for weeks, but is not contagious? There is no way to tell.
So I will stealthily go about my business, trying to not get close to anyone. I will bathe in hand-sanitizer with the hope that I will avoid another bout. Good luck to you all and I wish you good health.
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